Thursday, March 01, 2007

when reputation comes back to haunt you

minsan may mga bagay na mahirap takasan. siguro talagang it's in our nature na to be judgemental. actually hindi naman in our nature talaga eh, more of nakasanayan na natin. oo aaminin ko naman that i too have committed the crime of judging others. pero iba talaga pag-ikaw na ang hinusgahan. masakit. nakakainis. nakakaiyak. i've never cared much of what other people would say or kung ano magiging tingin nila sakin, i did what i wanted as long as it made me happy. selfish ba? siguro nga. but i'd rather be judged by others for doing the things na nakapagpasaya sakin kaysa namin dumating ang araw na ako na mismo ang tumingin sa sarili ko sa salamin at sabihin ang mga salitang "wala kang kwenta". people are still gonna judge me whatever i do, might as well have fun with it diba? minsan nga lang kasi unfair. when you've been labeled to be something you're doomed to have that stuck in your forehead forever.

kahit minsan hindi ko sasabihing pagkakamali yun..i followed my heart and i was so damn happy. nakakatawa lang at iba ang tingin ng mga tao sayo. i thought that by now, i've left it behind. akala ko tapos na ang mga bagay na yun. pero hindi pa pala. ang sarap sabihin na ang KAPAL ng mukha mo para sabihin yun na para bang ang linis ng pagkatao mo pero naisip ko din na hindi ba panghuhusga din ang gagawain kong yun??? oo nga masakit, pero ngayon ko dapat i-apply ang natutunan ko. never allow other people to hurt you. they can say everything that they want, the only way that it can come true is if you let them get to you. sino ba sila? hindi mo naman sila matuturing na kaibigan, hindi mo na din naman sila nakakasama pa. tapos na yun. they were never even part of your past kaya ok na siguro yun. i'm happy now. i'm content. i am the only one who can take this happiness from myself kung magpapa-apekto pa ko.

all i know now is i couldn't have lived a better life because everything falls into place.